This Is How to Be the Most Interesting Person in Any Conversation, According to Science

Science has learned that our deliberate brain systems are constantly filtering through a ton of information as we communicate with others. The key to using that filter effectively is to decide upon meeting new people that we are do not go in bearing an already preconceived notion of who we are talking to. Because our brains are constantly looking for ways to fulfill our expectations going in with a negative attitude ensures that we will find lots of reasons to bolster that assumption, just as if we enter with a mandate to find positive things we will find those instead. Not only is this positive aura good for ensuring we appear interesting and pleasant to know, it helps to ensure that we remain curious and open-minded. If we dispense with needing to propel our own agenda and instead focus on the other person, it’s a near certainty we will be remembered as someone that it was a pleasure to get to know.

Reflect on these key points:

  • 1To enter into a new relationship, or conversation, in a positive way, we need to turn off the reactive part of our brains that willingly bolster whatever preconceived negative notion we feed it.
  • 2To ensure a positive mindset and keep negative stereotypes at bay, it’s a good idea to decide ahead of time what you want the conversation to be about and let that shape your actions.
  • 3By focusing on the rewards of meeting someone, we exhibit interest in that person, thereby allowing our best self to shine, because focusing on threats stresses and ‘dumb-downs’ our brains.

“Other people are more easily attracted and feel socially closer to individuals that display curiosity.”

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